That's what I love about Sunday's....

I have ALWAYS been a Christian. Have gone to church off and on my entire life. Have listened to some AMAZING Pastors and, unfortunately, some not so great ones. The Pastor we have now, Rev. Saul, is one of the AMAZING one's. He has this gentle, warped sense of humor and keeps us laughing. He's been know to change the hymns on a whim, tell a hysterical joke and cry when they play Amazing Grace. When he preaches his sermon he walks around and talks with you, a lot of times asking for feedback. These days it's the FASTEST hour of the week.

Pastor Bob and Grandma next to him

My Grandmother sings in the choir...has for as long as I can remember. We just lost a 100 year old member and dear Bertie will be 100 this October. She just quit singing in the choir last year...but still comes to church MOST Sundays AND stands for prayer and hymns.

Morgan and Jonathan

When my son leaned in and pointed out that one of the hymns was a "good song" it made my heart smile. He really has been paying attention. Jon and Pastor Bob seem to have a connection. We are truly blessed to have a church that has soooo much history spread over more than 200 years AND such a wonderful leader.

I've always believed God is EVERYWHERE. The birds in the sky, the sunrises and sunsets and in the eyes of our children.

A season of compassion?

At this time of year everyone is so much more likely to be compassionate, caring and giving. While this is wonderful...shouldn't we ALWAYS be like that? Isn't that what we are called to do in the Bible...CARE? I am as guilty as the next person of getting wrapped up in the everyday freight train called life, that I forget go the extra step to be compassionate, caring and giving. But I do remind myself, on a regular basis, to stop and TAKE THE TIME.

When I saw the post over at The Life of a Suburban Princess it spurred me to share it with you. Like her, I'm happy to say several things on the list I do on a regular basis. But I'm going to see how many I can "check-off" the list before Christmas. And will definitely make several more part of my everyday life.

So in this season of hustle and bustle, black friday mayhem, and trying to find the perfect gift. Remember...He gave us the perfect gift.

I added #26 because I whole-heartedly believe we should do this on a regular basis. These families give sooo much every day...missed birthdays and holidays, hugs and kisses, soccer games and bedtime stories. A simple thank you, a cup of coffee, a smile...something small in the face of their huge task.

I will work at keeping you updated on my progress and linking back to the Princess' site. Join me...won't you?

1. Work at a soup kitchen
2. Deliver gifts or goodies to your neighbours
3. Pay for the person in line behind you in the coffee shop
4. Host or participate in a food drive
5. Work at the food bank for a day
6. Tip your mail carrier and delivery person
7. Donate used books and magazines to a library or doctor's office
8. Offer babysitting services to a friend
9. Deliver care packages to the homeless
10. Visit a nursing home
11. Deliver goodies to your local fire and police stations
12. Smile at strangers and say hello
13. Hold the door for everyone you see going into a building and ask them to do the same
14. Write snail mail to 5 people
15. Deliver old towels and blankets to the animal shelter
16. Give your spare change (or more) to someone in need
17. Over tip your waiter/waitress
18. Send letters or care packages to soldiers
19. Forgive someone
20. Take a meal or coffee to an elderly person
21. Leave a wake up surprise for your spouse or children next to their bed
22. Start a conversation with a new person, welcome them to your community
23. Write a letter to a parent you admire letting them know what a great job they are doing with their kids
24. Compliment 10 people
25. Send a text/email to someone you haven't spoken to for a while and let them know you are thinking about them
26. Shake the hand of a veteran or soldier thanking them for their sacrifice and service.

Pay it forward...

In the midst of trying to decide whether to have a yard sale or not I received a blog update that kind of made up my mind.  My Mom lived in Toledo for a few years and still has very good friends who live there.  A few months back they were hit with horrible tornadoes, causing quite a bit of devastation.  Here is just a small way we could help.  Sometimes the smallest things offer the biggest comfort.

God Bless...hope everyone is having a happy day!

212°

No, I'm not complaining about the heat.

A small, red 5x5" book gave me the inspiration I need. Well, actually the words contained inside did!  It is time to make some big decisions and commit to them! I know what I want, what I need.  In this case they are one in the same.  I need to get, be and stay organized.  I need to continue building my clientele.  I need to lose weight. I want to spend more time with friends and family, craft and organize my recipes.

I remember as a young girl sitting at the top of a hill on a make-shift go-cart.  My Uncle coaxing me to "drive" down the hill. To help set the scene...I was probably 7 or 8 years old, we were in the "stripper cuts" (you know the land where they had stripped for coal) aka our playground, and the hill was probably 4 feet high.  I was terrified, but needed/wanted to go down that hill. I finally did! WOW, how exhilerating and empowering. 

I remember after I was pregnant with our daughter being terrified...wondering what I'd gotten myself into, would I be able to handle being a parent.  Now as my daughter is getting ready to graduate, I realize YES...I was/am a good parent.

So many things in my life have given me pause.  Fear, doubt, unknowing...all crippling emotions.  Now its time!  It's time to drive down that hill.  It's time to rid my world of the things weighing me down and holding me back.  It's time to spread my wings...and SOAR!!!

Happy Easter!

What a glorious day! It has indeed been quite awhile since I have posted.  A good indicator of my life.  I could post of tax returns, laundry, lack of sleep...but no one wants to hear about that.  There have been several events in my life that have thrown me for a loop.  Of course there's death of loved ones, that while they hurt the heart, are able to be dealt with because everybody knows it's a "fact of life". But it's the other ones that hurt your heart in a different way that, unfortunately, have become a "fact of life". Trust...such a fundamental part of any relationship.  A tiny baby crying trusts her Mama to wrap her loving arms around her.  A new spouse trusting their partner to be faithful and love them 'til death. A patient trusting the doctor's to heal their bodies. We put such trust in people everyday.  Sometimes people we don't even know. 

And when that trust is betrayed, it's frustrating and it hurts.  But we can rise above the pain and learn a lesson from the hurt.  And I don't mean harden our hearts so we don't get hurt again.  That's part of the process.

I loved (still do) my Josie dog with every fiber of my being.  And it cut me to the core when I felt the life drain from her body.  But I wouldn't trade a single day of my life with her or loved her any less because of my broken heart. 

We have all made choices that hurt someone we love.  A child leaving home before their parents are ready to let them go, a loved one lost in a alcoholic haze, a friend so weighed down they think death is the only alternative.  And in these situations we feel betrayed!!!  We question "why didn't they come to me? I would've helped.".  We want answers.  But we want one particular question answered...WHY?! It seems if we can understand then it's ok. 

I am a Christian, have been my whole life. But only recently have I begun to truly understand what that means.  God teaches us by example how to deal with the betrayal.  No matter how much we turn from Him...He loves us!  He forgives us!  He doesn't ask why...it doesn't matter.  And when you are loved that much...Wow!

So as we approach Easter...look around at all of your Blessings.  Not your monetary items.  Your friends and your family!  They are God's Blessings!!!  Forgive!  Love!  Learn and lead by example...just as He does!

               HAPPY EASTER!!

Feel...

...the sun on your face, your childs hand in yours, the frustration of too much to do, the satisfaction of paying off that credit card, the anger toward the driver who just pulled out in front of you, the renewal of Sunday morning worship, the grief of feeling your dog go to sleep for the last time in your arms.


It seems the emotion we feel and display most often is anger. And unfortunately it seems to be the most accepted. Anger absolutely has it's place...toward the child abuser, the thief, the murderer. Anger is used for walls against pain and sadness. Forgiveness and healing cannot break through the walls of anger.


Happiness...the emotion everyone strives for, many fake and few truly feel. That happiness you felt on Christmas morning as a child, the happiness you felt when you past your driving test or the happiness you felt when you saw your soon to be spouse for the first time on your wedding day.


The emotion no one wants to feel...sadness! Crushing sadness. The kind you feel when you not only have to decide to put your best friend to sleep...but hold her in your arms as life drains from her body. The sadness of a longtime marriage coming to an end or your best friend moving 2000 miles away.

Feeling is healing! Ever called up a friend and start crying at the sound of their voice? Or you're doing OK until your Mom asks "are you ok?"...then you lose it? Crying to a song on the radio or happy tears when your watching 'A Christmas Visitor'. Venting with a friend when crazy drivers, maddening bosses and unruly kids are driving us mad. We feel better when we feel...really feel!!!

Goodbye dear friend...

March 30, 1997 was the day our dear Josie was born, 5 years to the day after my beautiful daughter, Morgan was born. Six weeks later she came to live with us. I was pregnant with my son at the time. Josie was very smart and caught on to commands quickly. She did, however, think that she was human. And I now know she wasn't...she was soooo much more!!!

I could tell many, many stories of how great she was. Funny stories too. She loved human food, bread and cheese being her favorites. Shortly after I redid the kitchen the cupboard were chipped. I finally figured why day I found the empty wrapper, from the brand new loaf of bread. She was jumping up and pulling the bread down. From then on we made sure to push the loaf to the back of the counter, but made sure she got a slice every morning.

She went camping, boating, swimming and to the drag strip. For over 12 years she was a very special part of our family. The vet had originally projected she would live to be 9 to 11 years old. When we passed 11 I was thrilled...when we reached 12...I was elated. I knew she was getting old but I was starting to think she might make it to 13. Unfortunately, that was not to be the case.

Her arthritis had increased but other than that she was healthy. Good heart and lungs, her eyesight was still good...I suspect her hearing was waining a bit though. Her appetite was good, especially for bread, cheese and ice cream. She loved when Jon won his ball game..she always got a baby vanilla in a cup.

On July 24th it became crystal clear that she couldn't be forced to endure anymore pain. Her back legs weren't working at all. And the pain meds she was on were, while a lethal dose for humans, not nearly enough to dull her pain. It was the hardest thing I have ever ever had to do. Morgan, Jack (the most amazing friend in the world) and I were with her. My friend Terri works at the vets and was there too. I can't tell you how much my heart was screaming no, no, no don't give her the injection while my mind knew this was my opportunity to love her as much as she had always loved me. She was in so much pain. And then for the first time in a very long time she was still, calm, pain free. But my friend was gone! The pain is unbearable! We burried her at the barn...she loved being at the barn...with her blanket from my ottoman and her rope.

Each day will get better...I know that. The week before Josie left us we had adopted a new puppy, her name is Sidney. Josie liked her. She certainly does not, will not, replace Josie...but she helps the healing process.

What is being a good parent?

I'm sorry I haven't posted for a while. The last couple of weeks have been overwhelming, to say the least. We've have been on, as I like to call it, a freight train that has been going way toooo fast.

So I ask..."what IS being a good parent?" Is it running to your kids to their sporting events, buying them whatever their hearts desire, picking up after them, making their life easier/better than ours? Picking them up when they fall, kissing boo-boos, always having neosporin handy? Teaching them to drive responsibly, not to do drugs, to wait to have sex (and how to be safe if they can't)? YES! But that's only the surface. I believe parenting is more about what your children learn from your heart.

Our recent life lessons began Thursday April 25th. We had planned a vacation, aka staying overnight at Splash Lagoon and playing in the tubes. Thursday while at work I broke a tooth during lunch...not fun. Thankfully, I have the worlds best dentist (and staff) and on my way home they called and could see me that evening. As I was rushing back out to my appointment I ran over my dog. Yes, you read that right. My dear beloved Josie! I didn't see her. My heart broke and I was in shock. I couldn't get out of the truck, I was so terrified! My neighbor rushed over and, after a frantic phone call to my hubby (who had just left also), he arrived too. Amazingly, she was alive! She ended up with a black eye (yes they can get black eyes), pulled ligaments, major bruising and lost a section of skin and hair on her back, but she was alive. We did go on our trip. A friend of ours stayed with Josie and took care of her. We had a nice and relaxing time, but there seemed to be a little dark cloud hovering.

So we get back home, take Josie to the vet just to make sure she will be ok, he said she would. Back to work and the freight train. Then here comes another Thursday! Frank had rehearsal, Morgan had to work and Jon had a baseball game. We were getting ready for the band to play a big show on the 4th of July at the drag strip. Jonathan's game got cancelled, due to rain, so we decided to go rent a movie. We went back home and shortly Frank and the bassist (Tod) showed up. I could tell something was wrong and Frank took my hand and told me Jonny's kitten has been hit and killed. I was heartbroken. But, that was nothing compared to the devastation my little boy felt. Penny slept with him every night. He cried so hard that night, as I laid with him in bed saying "I want my cat". His little body convulsing with uncontrollable sobs, I too cried wishing I could take his pain away. We slept together in the living room the next two nights.

And that's when the freight train came to a halt! The next day Jonathan and I spent the whole day together. Just being together. We did some errands, went to the sale, bought some new ducks. The whole family was in a state of mourning. I know, it's just a kitty, but she was more than that. We had saved her from certain death in the barn, nursed her and she quickly became part of our family. I would do anything to bring her back.

We proceeded through the holiday weekend, our hearts pain easing through the love of good friends and family. While we were at the track a youn gal we know dropped her 18 month old in my lap so she could go race. He stayed with me for the next hour and a half. He fell asleep in my arms. As he laid in my arms sleeping I remembered my own children in my arms, safe, comfortable. Toward the end of the day the day after Penny died Jonathan thanked me for laying with him and spending the day with him and told me he loved me. I am now a better parent. Helping your children heal just by loving them is healing to yourself. While I know the freight train will speed up now and then, I will never let it get so fast that I lose sight of what is important again.

Loving your children unconditionally, crying with them, laughing with them, being with them...that is being a good parent.

Welcome to the Jungle...

I remember when I first heard this song from Guns 'n Roses, I was glad to live in "quiet" Ohio far away from California and Vegas. While the jungle is how they referred to drug pushers, prostitutes, etc... I was recently smacked in the face with the reality that the jungle has spread!
What ever happened to being responsible for your actions? If you did a crime, you did the time. And more importantly, you learned from it and didn't do it again. It seems fairly simple to me. My kids have even managed to understand that...most of the time anyhow.

It used to be easy to tell who the bad guys were. They looked like bad guys. Not anymore! Now they could be a teacher, neighbor, relative...some of them even hide behind "the cloth". How do you trust anyone? How do you let your children out of your sight? I don't worry about what they'll do...I worry about what will be done to them. I was driving down the highway the other day and had to quickly move off the road to avoid someone driving up the middle of the road at a high rate of speed. Would my 16 year old have been watching her rear view mirror and seen them coming? If I have to hear of one more adult forcing themselves on a child I think I will scream. What is wrong with these people? We have a responsibility to protect our children, they are our future leaders and parents...they will repeat what they've learned. The same holds true for our elderly. How do people not only put their aging relatives in a less than stellar nursing home, but never go visit? And the aids...they treat these wonderful people horrible with no caring or feeling. These amazing people are the ones who helped form this nation and raise their families...don't they deserve to be treated with respect?

I know, I know...there are amazing nursing homes with caring staff, most of the teachers have their students best interest at heart and put in way to many hours without any additional pay and we are still living in the greatest country on earth. I just think we all have an obligation to step in and stop travesties that occur. Just think if each of us prevented one person from being abused, addicted to drugs, bullied, harrassed or swindled...what a different world we'd live in.

I'm RICH...

No, I didn't win the lottery....No, I didn't rob a bank....No, I didn't come up with the cure for cancer....but Yes, I am rich.

For a day that had it's ups & downs...it was a great day. I have had the fixings for chocolate chip and oatmeal cookies for a while, but haven't gotten around to actually baking them. Well, tonight was the night. Everyone was home and in the house, chores and running done by 7:30...a rare event in our household lately. I had put beef stew in the crock pot before work, so dinner was ready.

So as I'm mixing up my dough my daughter stopped in the kitchen to chat about her new friends and her exciting evening at the mall. My son also popped in and out to rattle off a thought or two. Meanwhile, hubby fired up the amp and started playing his guitar, figuring out new songs, stuff like that. There was no TV distracting our attention away from the family.

At one point hubby calls us in to watch an old video on youtube of Ted Nugent (one of his favorites). As we're watching I realize what a nice evening it is. We're all together!!! Enjoying being together!!! Sharing our passions, stories, days events, even dancing around the kitchen to daddy's playing. For that, I am Rich!! My children are truly a gift from God, but then again isn't everything. I was blessed to find my husband who has the same committment to our marriage as I. Mom, is a true gift. She taught me how to be strong, but tender at the same time, how to love unconditionally. Mark has an amazing gift of strength and quiet faith, and his intelligence in not only books but life is incredible.

I could go down the list of my riches, but I think you get the idea. Have you measured your wealth today? Not your bank account...but your everyday blessings and riches.

By the way, the cookies all turned out great. I'm not sure how long they'll last. Here's a couple of pictures...I know now you want one, huh? Should I put the coffee on? hehe

Busy, Busy Best Friend...

I was shocked and sad when I realized I hadn't posted in 10 days. Time sure is flying. Fall definately is a time of chores when you've spent your summer "playing" at the track. We supplement our regular heat with a wood burner. Not just to save money, but the heat is warmer. We also have a fireplace in the living room (another house selling point...too bad there isn't one in the bathroom!) that we enjoy burning in on cold evenings. When we first moved in (13 years ago) we split by hand! I can't believe my Grandfather split everything by hand, what a man! It didn't take long to purchase a splitter, now I can split too...wait that didn't work out right. haha

My BEST FRIEND is my precious dog Josie!!! She follows me everywhere, doesn't care what mood I'm in, hugs me when I cry (she really does, she wraps her head around my neck) and "talks" to me in the morning. Even when I'm splitting wood, she lays in the bark and shavings close by. I sure am gonna miss her when she's gone. They say your dog waits for you in heaven...I sure hope so!!!